I Cheated

The wait was killing me so I tested this afternoon when I ran home at lunch. It was very much a BFN. Eh, looks like I'll be waiting it out for 4 more days and keeping an eye on my temps in the meantime. The BFN was enough to make me stop testing for now...that's for sure. *sigh*

Tick Tock, Tick Tock

Four more days and counting until I test at 14 DPO and the wait is starting to get to me. I'm still so confused by this cycle. My post-O temps aren't even the slightest bit similar to those of the past two cycles (one TTA cycle and our 1st cycle of TTC). In the past, my post-O temps have been all over the place with alot of peaks and valleys and this time around there's little variation between each one, almost like a see-saw pattern. Also, as I blogged about before, the temps. around when FF says I ovulated aren't 100% accurate, so that's throwing me off, too. I have to admit, I've been feeling very down about this cycle so far, especially after my temp. dropped a bit yesturday morning. However, now that my temp. went back up again this morning, my optimism is slightly renewed.

I just feel like this whole cycle has been a guessing game of sorts and I certainly feel ready for it to end - whatever the end result may be.

For anyone who's interested, here is my PITA chart:

Giving Up On My Chart

My chart this cycle is a mess. I have several inaccurate temps. due to drinking the night before (we've had alot of family birthdays we've been celebrating this month) and one inaccurate temp. from not thinking and getting out of bed to go to the bathroom without temping first. As a result, even though I've gotten crosshairs, I don't feel that I can rely on them at all. On top of that, even the temps. that I feel I can rely on, create a very different patten from both of the previous two months that I've been charting. My chart just looks so different from before.

According to FF, I'm 4 DPO as of today and I can at least rest assured that I've ovulated as both yesturday and today's temperatures have certainly increased enough to convince me, however, I think it's more likely that I may only be 3 DPO. I guess we'll see. At this point, I'm not feeling very optimistic about this cycle at all. FF rated our timing of sex as "good", but IMO, it leaves much to be desired. The only thing I can hope for is that the Pre-seed we used will help us out this time around, especially since I had zero EWCM this cycle even after drinking Green Tea daily from the time AF ended up until around the time I ovulated.

I know I'm only 2 cycles in, but I never dreamed it would be this difficult of a process. I've actually pulled myself away from the baby boards on The Nest, because I don't feel that they're helping with my feelings right now. Each month is such a rollarcoaster in terms of emotions that it's starting to weigh on me a bit.

No Summer Classes for Me!

After looking over the available courses for the summer term, there are absolutely NO evening or online classes - let alone either of the 2 remaining courses that I need to take. I even attempted to look into doing a consortium agreement for the summer term with one of the other colleges in our area but didn't have much luck. Neither of them had any courses that would fullfill these credits for me either. It figures, one of the courses is a core Humanities requirement which has approximately 16 courses that you can choose from that would count as credit and NONE of them are being offered. I don't quite understand that one.

At first, I was a bit pissy about it since I'll now have to take these 2 courses in the fall and wait to officially get my degree until the beginning of Novemeber - IF they're even offered then. Then there's the issue of pushing back when I take the CFP exam (original plan was to finish school in early August, take a CFP review session for a few months, and sit for the exam in November). Since we're TTC, that isn't the most ideal situation but I guess sometimes you just do what you have to do. I'm finally starting to warm up to the idea of having an entire summer off from school though. Last summer was rough with the amount of homework I was assigned and I didn't get to enjoy much of the warm weather as a result. Plus, after taking a total of 33 credits this year all while working full-time, I could certainly use a break.

Either way, I suppose that if I were to get pregnant this cycle, I wouldn't even be due until late December meaning that in the worst case scenario, I'd still have a good month and half between when the fall term is over and my due date. I guess I'll just take this one day at a time for now and see what happens from here.

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

WTF Chart?

I have no idea what is going on this cycle. My chart started out fairly similar to last month's and now, it looks as if I may have ovulated on CD 8- I'm only on CD 10 now and typically don't ovulate until somewhere between CD 17-21! My temperature on CD 5 is throwing things off a bit since I forgot to adjust my alarm clock for Daylight Savings before going to bed the night before and I ended up temping late. It's really all going to depend on what my temp. does tomorrow morning at this point.

While our timing would still be good, I don't want to have O'd yet! LoL. I really wanted to give pre-seed a chance this cycle and it hasn't even arrived yet. I've had some watery CM thus far, but no EWCM to speak of, which is the main reason I hope my chart is just psyching me out - good timing doesn't necessarily mean squat if there's no CM to help out. Since I've been drinking green tea at least once a day since AF this cycle, that seems odd to me seeing as I normally have at least one day of prominent EWCM and green tea is supposed to aid in CM production. If I do end up ovulating early this time around, I'm thankful that we've been sure to have sex once a day this week, however, I'm going to keep my fingers crossed that my temp. drops tomorrow and keeps the crosshairs away.

For anyone wondering, here's what I'm talking about:

Pre-seed, Here We Come.

I was originally planning to hold off until next cycle (if this one isn't successful) to try it out, but since I managed to find a good a deal on it I purchased some from www.early-pregnancy-tests.com this morning. I decided to go with the multi-use tube that comes with 6 applicators and 2 free pregnancy tests for $14.99 + free shipping. Now I'm just hoping that it will come in time for ovulation this month. Luckily, since I ovulate later in my cycle, I'm pretty sure it'll get here just in time; especially since the website boasts same-day shipping on all purchases.

For those who aren't familiar with Pre-Seed, here's what the website says about it's use:
"Pre-Seed is the first and only “Sperm-Friendly" Intimate Moisturizer that replenishes your natural moisture while providing an optimal environment for sperm. Pre-Seed’s moisture mimics natural body secretions to relieve vaginal dryness - with the same pH and osmolarity as semen. Pre~Seed also protects cell function and acts as an "antioxidant" - supporting both conception and pleasurable intercourse. Click here to read our chat with Dr. Joanna Ellington, inventor of Pre~Seed, to find out why it's the only lubricant suitable for trying to conceive purposes!"

It's managed to get rave reviews on all of the conception/pregnancy websites I've looked at thus far, so I guess we shall see.

Our Relaxing Weekend

Due to the very rainy weather, Mike and I had a rather lazy weekend. Most of it was spent indoors napping on the couch. I snapped this picture of Mike and Louis during one such nap and just had to share - it's just too priceless not to.

An Interesting Proposition

Let me preface this by saying that this is fairly hypothetical and very much up in the air at the moment, but it's something for Mike and I to think about in the coming weeks.

A few years back, my BIL bought a house out in the country near where Mike and I would someday like to buy a home as well. At the time, he was engaged and his finace and him worked extensively on fixing up this house so that it would be move in ready by the time they were planning to be married. As it happened, they broke off the engagement and decided to go their seperate ways. His fiance moved out and he remained in the home. The agreement at that time was that within a few months, they would transition the mortgage over into his name only. Well, months turned into years and he never did get the mortgage switched over. Finally, after much prodding by my MIL, he finally starting working to get this done last summer. Apparantly, he doesn't have the best credit and has been unable to be approved for a mortgage in his name only for the home, which brings me to today.

Over the weekend, BIL mentioned to Mike that he would just like to sell the home at this point and be done with it. Obviously, it's up to his ex-fiance as to whether or not she'd like to live in the house at that point (she would most likely be approved on her own) since it's still legally hers, but Mike's interest was instantly piqued by this as we would very much like to buy the home if they decide to sell it. The pros to the situation would be:

1.) While the house would need some cosmetic work, it's in great condition structurally and most of the large projects have already been done to it by BIL and his ex. It has alot of potential.
2.) The only room that would need to be completely updated would be the bathroom.
3.) It is much larger than the house we have now so when we do have children, we can stay in the house longer before needing to move (current home that we rent would only accomodate one child comfortably).
4.) There is a large backyard.
5.) House is on a quiet road that would be great for walking the dog.
6.) We could take advantage of the very low mortgage rates right now and possibly the first-time homebuyer tax credit for 2009.
7.) Since it is much less expensive than homes we are currently saving for, we would have a very nice downpayment and decent equity in it (potentially).
8.) We could get out of the city (which we hate) and finally live out where we'd like to.
9.) Since I'll be graduating in a few months, I'll have the time to devote to working on the home.
10.) It has a two-car garage. We currently can't use our one-car garage because DH works out of it as part of his side business.

The cons include:
1.) Doing business with a family member.
2.) The added expenses since we weren't planning on buying for a few years.
3.) The bathroom will need a complete renovation.
4.) The kitchen will also need some updates.
5.) There is no landscaping to speak of at all.
6.) We'd have to fence in the backyard for the dog.
7.) It would add about 10-15 min. onto my commute each day and about 20 min. to Mike's.

Mike mentioned something to his brother about possibly being interested in it last night so we'll see how it goes. BIL is always staying overnight at our house since he works in the city and spends most of his time at the downtown bars on the weekends. We've always joked that we should switch houses (we currently rent from my MIL - his mother), but for the first time it actually sounds like it may be a viable option for us.

I'm trying not to get too excited at the potential prospect just yet, but it's proving to be more difficult than I thought.

BFN and Declining Temps.

Well, it looks as if Cycle #1 was a bust. I tested yesturday at 10 DPO and got a BFN. My temp. also dropped yesturday morning and then again today. I typically have a 13 day LP based upon my first charted cycle last month, so I'm assuming that AF will show just as scheduled within the next two days. I'll admit that I'm bummed, but I wasn't really expecting it to happen right away anyway. Here's to another month of hoping, wishing, and praying for our little one!